Admired
by Hitomi Cassie
Summary: FujiSyusukexOC - Getting back a long lost friend, Fuji Syusuke realizes that she may come back to him more than a friend. Would they live happily ever after or another loss?
1. I

I

Sumire Ryuzaki, with her granddaughter, Sakuno, entered one of the most prestigious and glamorous theatres in Tokyo. They were in the orchestra section and had tickets for the best seats, the middle front row.

The red curtains opened and classical music filled the whole structure. The main character entered the stage and all were captivated by her beauty. Well, she's not the most beautiful, nor perfectly beautiful, not even very beautiful, but she possesses charms that will truly attract anyone, especially when she dances.

Arisa Ryuzaki, Sakuno's sister and Sumire's granddaughter was a ballet dancer, a distinguished, known ballet dancer, classical, contemporary and neoclassical. Once she dances, it seems that the entire universe is in motion, united with her. It's as if she could touch the sky with her graceful turns, skips and leaps. And because of this, she was one of the best ballet dancers in Japan.

It was fair though, for her to be the best one in Japan, since she was a child, she had been practicing and working hard all her life to be a good dancer. Ballet was her life.

Everyone watched intently and followed every move of the girl who seemed like an angel God gave. The show was a success.

She showcased an angelic smile as she bowed with the cast. Fuji Syusuke, who watched with her sister, marveled at the girl. "She's really good. Hey, she's in your school right?" Yumiko Fuji, his sister, whispered.

He nodded. _And my childhood best friend. _Fuji thought until Arisa distanced herself from him. She also gave an impression that it was his fault, not her.

"I'm starting to enjoy this ballet thing… After all, it is a girly thing." Yumiko said as they exited the theatre.

"I won't watch ballet if it wasn't for Arisa, you know that, don't you?" Fuji said.

"I know. I wasn't implying that you were gay, you know." Yumiko blabbed.

-

The next morning was a school day. Congratulations from different individuals poured on her and she loved attention. She lived in a world where nothing was real, where everything was pretend, everything was cruel.

She was at the top and she'd stop at nothing to sustain her position. She stepped on every person possible and eliminated anything getting on her way.

She doesn't have real friends. All her friends are either using her to be at the top, others leave her for she has hurt them in every way possible, others are afraid to battle through her world. A world where is such despair, materialism and vanity. It was as if the essential things aren't essential, all that matters is being at the top of the social hierarchy and being the center of everything.

Those walking with her at the hallway, chatting with her, following her, those with gifted bodies, pretty faces, and un-intelligent girls are those who have everything but lost those of great importance. They live in lies, deception and envy for what, to have fame and popularity. They have lost the meaning of life.

"Ballerinas dance on tiptoes so that they could touch the sky yet keep their feet on the ground." That was the beauty of ballet, that was what she believed, to stay on the ground, until she woke up in the reality of highschool.

Sakuno always tried to remind her but she wouldn't listen. "If that's what you're doing, you'll never be like me, not even close. You're a loser like everybody else and that's the attitude that's required for you to accomplish nothing."

She never did understand that line, she wasn't aware of what she did that will make her fail miserably, if she ever did something. But no matter how Arisa brings Sakuno's spirits down, that doesn't change how high she looks up to her sister, after all, Sakuno is everything Arisa wasn't.

All kinds of rumors and gossip surround her, all kinds of judgments and hatred, all because of envy. News travel fast and everyone knows her past. They use her past to their own advantage and manipulate the story so it will look bad for her.

Fuji wanted to congratulate her so badly, but he was afraid to ruin everything for her. He was afraid for he could feel anger from Arisa towards him.

-


	2. II

II

That afternoon, Sakuno and Arisa were walking down a street. Far up ahead, they saw a group of familiar people. It was Ryoma, Eiji, Momoshiro and Fuji. They walk towards them since that's their way home. Just then by the corner, a girl appeared, she was running. She bumped to Fuji and it got to the point that she fell on Fuji's arms and he asked her if she was alright. The girl blushed and when Fuji put her down, she hugged him claiming that he was her prince.

Arisa's temperature rose. Her face was red, tomato red. She ignored everything that happened and planned to ostracize them. Just then, Eiji and Momo blushed upon seeing her and Fuji opened his eyes. Sakuno was also flushed upon seeing Ryoma.

They got nearer to them when two boys who were running after the girl, whose name was Kurumi said their reasons on why they were chasing her. They solved it easily, by Eiji shouting that Junior High students were bullying a grade-schooler.

"Uhm… Arisa-san, we're passing by a burger joint. Want to come?" Eiji said.

"No. Thanks anyways." She said with a blank face and expression.

"Oh… come on! And besides, it's free; Fuji-kun will treat us!" Momo cheered.

"I said no. I'm sorry." She said it kindly except for the _no_ part.

"Nee-chan, uhm can't we–" Sakuno interfered.

"Sakuno," she smiled calmly. "I said no." She was still smiling and she emitted the sweetest voice ever, exept that her eyes who were glued to Sakuno were filled with rage.

"I'm really sorry. We have to go." Arisa said looking back in a 'sorry' way and took off. They all watched her walk away with her hips gracefully swaying. "What are you looking at?" Kurumi asked and looked at Arisa then at the four and back again.

With this, they looked somewhere else. "Nothing." They said innocently in unison.

Let's face it, she was evil, yes, but recall your stereotypes and from what I remember, populars were wanted by everybody.

-

She got home, kissed her grandmother. She passed by her mother, bowed and greeted _good evening_ without eye contact.

Her father wasn't home yet; he comes home very late at night. They rarely see each other since after dinner; she locks herself up in her room. The only one who has the key and is allowed to enter aside from her is her grandmother.

She has withdrew herself from her parents and from Sakuno, all she has left in that family is her grandmother.

A disappointment, that was what she was to her parents.

_Six years ago, a candle was knocked over, the window was open and a breeze that came in gave life to an immense fire. Her room was on fire, she left Sakuno playing inside aside from the fact that her parents gave her strict order to keep watch, but she didn't. Sakuno was almost killed, she was almost killed._

_She heard her mother shouting at her father in a regretting tone. "This is all a mistake! This is all a mistake! She's not supposed to be in this house! It was all her fault! This is all your fault!"_

"_My fault? Don't you dare throw that to me!" her father replied._

"_She almost killed our daughter! She's a disappointment. This is her fault!" her mom said sobbing._

"_Do not say that! Don't you dare say that! She's your daughter for goodness' sake!" the dad shouted._

"_No! She's not!" and at this, her sobs grew louder._

_They heard Arisa breathing deeply, tears running down her cheeks. She was in shock with the fire, and then this? She passed out._

-

_When she woke up in the hospital, the first person she saw was her grandmother. Arisa was kissed by her grandma on the forehead. At the opposite side of the bed, was her sister. "Nee-chan!" she said cheerfully. Arisa looked at Sakuno with all disgust._

_Their parents entered the room. "Let's get coffee, Sakuno!" Sumire said._

"_Okay." Sakuno skipped outside._

_Her mother stroked her hair then she ran her fingers on her cheeks. She pushed it away. She was crying now._

"_I'm sorry honey!" her mother said. "We didn't mean it."_

"_So, I'm not your daughter at all?" Arisa asked._

"_Of course you are, in our hearts you are." Her dad says._

"_Just tell me the truth!" Arisa shouted._

"_Your mother gave you up and we took you in. You were so fragile then and we had to do something." Her mother explained. Arisa cried at this revelation._

_Arisa had acute heart problems since she was born but it grew worse. The doctor said she needs to be rushed to the hospital as soon as she has an attack; she was given medications and all. If she hadn't collapsed, if she wasn't rushed to the hospital, no one would've known the development of the disease and her life wouldn't have been prolonged._

_This was somehow a blessing, her parents tried to undo the damage they had done by showering her with gifts and spending more time with her. They gave her proper medical attention; they supported her in her decisions. But after all these, Arisa chose to look at the negative side. She chose to keep hatred in her heart and she chose to believe that her adoptive parents didn't even love her._

-


	3. III

III

_17th Journal Entry_

I saw Syusuke Fuji today. I would really like to join them for a snack but then I wouldn't want to ruin the 'atmosphere' for that 'damsel in distress' he 'rescued'.

Syusuke Fuji, he reminded me of a memory I would want to bury forever, but it seemed impossible. I have kept it in me for so long.

Six years ago, I was a child who did not consider the consequences of her own actions. I was at the center of attention the whole neighborhood. I was winning competitions, appearing on small plays, being pretty and how I enjoyed it.

It made me feel loved and important in such a big world where we, humans, are just a tiny dot on the face of the earth. It made me feel wanted for I have this gap inside that I can never explain and attention was temporarily filling this gap.

I was on top until Fuji moved next to us. At first, we were good friends and I enjoyed our time together, until I noticed that everyone was become focused on him. He took my attention being such a 'gifted' and 'talented' boy, such a 'handsome' and 'charming' young man.

I was desperate to get it back and trample him down but I cannot. I can't bring myself to hurt him and so, I did something I never thought I would do. I was blinded by anger at myself for being weak and so, I 'accidentally' put a candle near a curtain. I 'accidentally' put a candle at a place where I am sure, a young playing Sakuno would knock it over and I 'accidentally' open the curtain to let in a breeze that would sure make a fire.

I put myself in danger just to get attention, it was all planned out, I would get Sakuno out and keep her safe and just endanger my life, without getting killed, just so I could get the neighborhood's attention.

It worked though it didn't last for long. I didn't know what to do and I can't hurt Fuji. I was so jealous of him, I can't bear to be with him and I just distanced myself from him.

Okay… so much about that Fuji guy... it makes me angry. He's the least of my worries now. I have a lot of problems and I don't need him to come back and ruin my perfect life. He already did and he's not going to do it again. I won't let him. He can only ruin it when I'm dead… at least he won't have a life to ruin.

BTW… this the first time I mentioned him since I didn't want to remember him but then the almost heart attack incident made me. And besides, we never talk in school. I don't even see him there (maybe because I don't look at him since I don't want to see him). So, that was the first stare I had from him in years.

Change topic, I might break my precious pencil while writing about him.

I hope I could be Eiji's friend. If he was a typical student, I could've used my popularity to be his friend, but then, he isn't and so, I'd have to do extra extra work.

I can't believe I'm actually saying this but I don't care about my public image, I don't care how it will affect me, I just want to be Eiji's friend, I find him, rather, interesting, fascinating too.

That Ryoma guy seemed to be a really nice boy. I also think Sakuno likes him though such a nice boy doesn't deserve someone like Sakuno.

There… I'm done writing for today. I'm going to sleep. Not peacefully maybe…

This day is filled of things I did I haven't done in decades!

_end of 17th Journal Entry_

**-**

Eiji wandered the school grounds looking for someone he'd ask for lunch. He forgot to bring his and no one seems to be in a good mood for helping.

He saw Arisa sitting on a bench somewhere remote. Rarely does this opportunity happen for Arisa was usually with the crowd of the high and mighty. He approached her. "Hey. Do you mind if I sit beside you?"

"I would like that." Arisa replied smiling at Eiji.

Eiji sighed then said, "I forgot my lunch… do you have some?"

"Oh… too bad… I sold my lunch to Sakuno since she forgot hers. Maybe tomorrow, I'll share my lunch to you."

"Wow… shocking." Eiji whispered.

"What is?"

"I thought it would be hard to befriend you. That company of yours are very tough, they never let people go near you."

Arisa giggled. "Wait a second, I'll get us lunch."

After fifteen minutes, she arrived with two packs. She gave the other one to Eiji. "How did you get these?" he asked.

"I announced charming as I can while twirling my hair, 'I was wondering if I could have two packs of bento.'" She smiled.

They ate and talked about random things, such as the teddy bear in Eiji's room (turns out Arisa had the same one only it was in a tutu), acrobatics (which they agreed is not that far away from ballet but is still completely different from ballet) and chocolates (both appeared to be addicted to chocolates though Arisa is doing a little sacrifice to get fit for dancing).

"Hmmm… you gave me lunch and I shall repay you! How about, tomorrow afternoon?" Eiji offered.

"Okay." Arisa stood up. "I'll meet you here after school." She added.

-


	4. IV

IV

_18th Journal Entry_

I know that this is so petty and that romantic love is far more dangerous than this but this is my Journal and I will write what I feel, no matter how sissy-ish it is.

It's good to have something to confide with, to tell your own feelings to, to pour out everything like this wuss-ish journal of mine, but then again, it's better to have someone who will give you a hug, give you suggestions, comfort you, help you cope in life whenever you pour everything to that person.

_End of 18th Journal Entry_

-

_19th Journal Entry_

I haven't written in while. It's summer and the semester turned out to be nice. I had those people who will reply back and love me back whenever I confide in them. I just realized I've had them all along; it's just that I never opened up.

There's grandmother, Eiji and Kagami. Kagami is my other neighbor. Since I was a child, I've been confiding everything to her. She was there every time I needed her but then I wasn't with her in school, I never was.

She didn't run with me on the popular group, I keep wondering why and I can't risk my social life by being with her but then she has sacrificed a lot for me. She has tolerated me, forgave me in all my abandoning, I know for the fact that she was true. She wasn't like those people in school who never gave importance to anything.

Eiji had inspired me to become a better person. I had a new perspective in life. I now know I will never be alone. I never was. I've recognized the people around me and I'm taking a better path. They have guided and helped me in my struggles.

They even helped me discover a new talent of mine. I've been working on this posh patisserie. I design cakes and help the people there make them and surprise, surprise, my cakes are a hit! They're elegant, sweet and lovely.

It started during History class. I've always loved History but then our substitute was so boring. I've had the same History teacher since I can remember and it was a shock to me seeing a new face enter the room. I did not like the teacher so I did not listen and out of my boredom, I started doodling. The doodle became a cake then the cake became really nice.

Grandmother said I should enrich my talent and Eiji helped me find a good patisserie. We found one and I applied. I made a really crappy CV (I still do not know why I need to make a CV since it's just a part-time job) so Kagami made a new one.

Even though these all seemed well, there were some side effects. Eiji was a friend of Fuji and Eiji keeps dragging me with his group. I don't know why he has to do that, at first I had to come and get to spend time with Fuji but when I caught Eiji alone and explained that Fuji and I weren't really good with each other and he seemed to understand, so, when he's with his group, he doesn't drag me anymore.

I walk home with Kagami. Somehow, I can't risk my social life and I just had to stay at with the crowd. She seems to understand and she lets me. Now, our bond is greater.

I am not alone.

_End of 19th Journal Entry_

-

Arisa was working on a cake for a debut when she received a call from Eiji. "Patisserie de Vianne. How can I help you?"

"Eh? Arisa?" Eiji asked.

"Yes. It is me." Arisa replied.

"Great. I was beginning to feel nervous since it might be someone else."

"Eiji, I can't keep accepting personal calls during my shift you know." Arisa said.

"I know, but this is an emergency. A pastry emergency!" Eiji said.

Arisa lowered down her voice to match Eiji's. "Okay, what is it and why are we whispering?"

"Well, you see, the whole team is here and they finished the cake I made for the special visit I am to have today." He explained.

"Ah. That. Well, ding." an 'idea' sound effect was heard.

"What is that?" Eiji asked.

"It's the oven." Arisa replied. "Hold on there, Eiji, I am to deliver pastry immediately!"

"Thank you so much for saving me again!" he shouted full of glee.

Arisa opened the oven to reveal chocolate cupcakes with fudge filling. She put pink frostings and topped them with a cherry. She got a dozen of those cupcakes and placed it in a cute box. The box was stripped of the colours hot pink and yellow green, just like a candy cane stripe. It had a logo of the patisserie Arisa was working for.

"I have to go, emergency delivery on-going." Arisa shouted and sped to Eiji's place. She knocked on the back door and they started whispering.

"Here." Arisa presented. "It's on me."

"Are you sure?" Eiji asked.

"Of course, I'm here to help." She smiled and started to leave but then Eiji held on to her wrist to stop her.

"What? I'm in a hurry." Arisa said.

"It's summer, why don't you, Kagami and I go somewhere?" Eiji asked.

"Sure but after my ballet camp thing. They said they want me to present on this theatre at a faraway place here in Japan." Arisa replied.

"Great. I think I have training camp too." Eiji whispered.

"Okay. See you then. I really need to go. I am taking too long for a delivery and the owner of the cake I'm working on might arrive any minute now." Arisa said.

"Yeah and the Chocolates are probably here too. Oh that popular idol group. I am so lucky they picked my house in that raffle." Eiji said dreamily.

"Eiji! My shift!" Arisa raised her voice.

"Oh, sure. Bye!"

"Bye!" Arisa waved.

-


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